Car-Poral Keys is a retrofuturistic first-person Source 2013 modification that pits you, Jim, against your evil neighbour, Jim's Neighbour, after realising he stole your car keys. With your job on the line, you must race through over 40 different rooms located entirely within your basement, ranging from vast valleys, to cities and even tiny vertigo puzzles. Can you find your keys? Can you defeat Jim's Neighbour? Can you discover the secret power of the lost Originiginal tribe? Find out when Car-poral Keys explodes onto your weathered CRT monitor this [INSERT RELEASE DATE HERE]. WARNING: We are not responsible for brain damage caused by playing Car-poral Keys. QUALITY NOT ASSURED

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Why the heck it's still not done after nearly 5 years in development?


I hope this simple diagram explains it


We have too much content to make and our hands are tiny. Currently the mod is being worked on by 2.5 people and a pile of used tissues.

How are you gonna fix that?

Oh, silly you.

You are the one thats gonna be fixing that.

That's right. I, Matt, the art-ay and mapping mastermind, is hiring slaves mapping minions to help me finish this godforsaken pile of .bsp files.


What do I get for being tortured by hammer.exe?

You will get a wholesome of:

- Partial early access to mods content

- Pictures of food monthly

- You can ask me to make assets for your project as long as you work on CPK

Where do i mail you a bomb, weirdo?

Right here.

Traditionally, WIP screenshots.

News Update #2160p: Nearly Done?

News Update #2160p: Nearly Done?

News 2 comments

Sorry for the lack of updates, there hasn't been a great deal of time for me this year. I have been working on the mod in little bursts and have just...

News Article #1080p

News Article #1080p

News 7 comments

Here's some fresh new content for you filthy kids!

News Article #666

News Article #666

News 2 comments

More stuff is done, getting closer to completing the project...

News Article #5

News Article #5

News 12 comments

A new video, update on % completion, voice acting position, what is left to do. The end is in sight... I think.

Comments  (0 - 10 of 55)
Guest
Guest

no files sadly :( it says released wtf??

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Mattscreab Creator
Mattscreab

just wait a few more years and bam its done

Reply Good karma+1 vote
SPY-maps
SPY-maps

Have been looking at some video's of this insane mod and it is soooo funny!
Really hope you dev guys can find the time and effort to release this mod. Because again, it really is sooooo funny!

Hope you release date is in sight.

Leon

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Turbo.Diesel.Guy
Turbo.Diesel.Guy

Diesel Turbo

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Moopium Creator
Moopium

I only drink Unleaded 95.

Reply Good karma+1 vote
Mattscreab Creator
Mattscreab

vehicles suck

Reply Good karma+1 vote
Novatice
Novatice

how about person that's an attack helicopter?

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Barney.Calhoun
Barney.Calhoun

Looks funny, I love comedy mods so, good luck. Hope to see this released.

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drugbugz
drugbugz

This game is going to be unique and i ******* love it.

Reply Good karma Bad karma+2 votes
HACKƐD
HACKƐD

OMG this is still in dev i thought this died last year.

Reply Good karma Bad karma+1 vote
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tupac in a tube top and some tube socks eating pop rocks #raps

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