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Yo, wut up? haha
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Latest tweets from @lava89
I have a hard time accepting Cap'n Crunch as a true "Captain".
Apr 5 2016
My dog seems to bark the loudest at UPS trucks.....he must see them as the "mother ship" of the post office.
Mar 17 2016
Back in my day, people didn't text while driving....you had to use a typewriter while riding a bike.....
Feb 20 2016
So if I only sell balloons and not make them, would that make me a "balloon dealer"?
Feb 16 2016
I want an inflatable ladder, so if I have enough air, I can climb up into space.
Dec 30 2015
I hate it when people say that Batman has horns....they're obviously antlers!
Dec 27 2015
The fact that Smokey the Bear complains about fires, but arms himself with only a shovel sounds like a classic case of self victimization.
Dec 10 2015
I want to visit a point in time before staple guns...when everyone still used staple bows and arrows.
Nov 2 2015
I want to wear shoeboxes over my shoes in public...I'll be like those guys that always put a tarp on their car in the parking lot.
Oct 8 2015
I now realize that ChapStick is basically Vaseline on a stick.
Oct 5 2015