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Chompster
Chompster

ouch..

..lol

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Sanguinius Creator
Sanguinius

Ohh snap :D

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ℱℓσℊℊℯɾ
ℱℓσℊℊℯɾ

Why do people make fun of France ._.

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rkraptor70 Author
rkraptor70

France in Mexico.

During the US Civil War the USA was too busy to enforce the Monroe Doctine. So France moves in and takes over Mexico. In one battle (Cinco De Mayo) a 5000 man French unit gets beat by 2000 Mexicans. The French consolidate power there. Then the USA ends the Civil War and tells the French to get the hell out of Mexico. France tucks its tail and packs its bags and leaves without a fight.

World War One.

USA declares war on Germany. Around April 1917.
French soldiers mutiny and refuse to fight. I think that was in May 1917.
US soldiers start to arrive in France. June 1917.
French soldiers start to fight again. June 1917.

World War Two.

Germany and USSR invade Poland. Poland fights until it is entirely over run.
Germany invades Belgium. Belgium fights until it is entirely over run.
Germany invades Netherlands. Netherlands fight until they are entirely over run.
Germany invades France. France bellies up while most of it is still free of Germans.

French Indochina.

French get their butts kicked at Dien Bein Phu and runs home and leaves the whole mess to the USA.

NATO.

French are part of NATO. But then they pull out in 1967. So they are still protected by NATO (USA, Great Britain, Italy, Germany, Belgium, Netherlands, etc), safe behind NATO, without having to put any thing of their own on the board to protect the other nations closer to the Soviets. France returns to NATO in 2009 after the USSR is long gone. (The danger is gone so now they want to "help" again.

Those are not jokes. Those are facts. Even the English word "coward" comes from the French.

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RighteousFighter
RighteousFighter

The mutinies of WW1 were caused by the huge amount of losses on the French side, not because of cowardice. And the appearance of Americans wasn't the reason they returned to fight.

The French continued to fight till the end during WW2. The French had a large resistance movement running underground.

None of these things tell us that the French soldiers are cowards, however arrogant and unreliable their government might be. Rather, the French tend to goof up their military actions throughout the history, whether it be the crusades, 100 years war, Italian wars, Napoleons campaigns or the examples you mentioned.

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WeeGee9000
WeeGee9000

To sum it up: Its just a joke

now move along

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ℱℓσℊℊℯɾ
ℱℓσℊℊℯɾ

486 A.D.Battle of Soissons
The Franks, led by King Clovis I, defeat Syagrius and the remains of the Western Roman Empire.
496 A.D.Battle of Tolbaic
The Franks, led by Clovis I, are victorious over the Alamanni.
507 A.D.Battle of Vouille
The Franks, led by Clovis I, defeat Alaric II (the conqueror of Spain) and his Visigoths in a decisive victory.
732 Battle of Tours / Battle of Poitiers
The Carolingian Franks, led by Charles Martel, defeat a large invading Muslim force under the command of Abdul Rahman Al Ghafiqi.
773 Battle of Pavia
Charlemagne and his Frankish forces defeat King Desiderius of the Lombards.
1214 Battle of Bouvines - July 27th
Philip Augustus of France overwhelmingly defeats Germany's Otto IV and Count Ferrand of Flanders.
1690 Battle of Beachy Head
Another naval battle sees the French victorious over their Anglo-Dutch counterparts.
1707 Battle of Almansa - April 25th
During this battle of the War of the Spanish Succession, the kingdoms of France and Spain proved victorious over the English, Portuguese and Dutch.
1805 Battle of Austerlitz - December 2nd
Napoleon I of France is decidedly victorious over Russia and the Austrian Empire.

1914 First Battle of the Marne - September 5th-10th
A Franco-British (largely French) force led by Joseph Joffre and John French defeat Germany led by Helmuth von Moltke and Karl von Bulow

1914 Togoland - August 26th
A Franco-British force successfully invades the German West African protectorate of Togoland.

1941 Battle of Koufra
French forces, led by LeClerc, defeat the Italians.

1944 Operation Dragoon
Tassigny and his French forces liberate the towns of Toulon and Marseilles from German control.

wait ... this the Humor group :O OUCH !

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_w_
_w_

1302; battle of the golden spurs

9000 flemish men with only 350 knights (everyone including the latter fought on foot though) destroyed the French attackers, 8500 experienced fighters & armed with heavy weapons. Thanks to their choice of terrain & tactics the flemish prevailed.

FLANDERS THE LION

Too bad our world position later detoriated due to the war with the spanish, french and austrians... if only we couldve driven off the spanish like the duth did..

@flogger.. a lot of frankish and charlemagne battles there.. note that the franks were germanic tribes and charlemagne had a lot of ties with belgium.

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ℱℓσℊℊℯɾ
ℱℓσℊℊℯɾ

Well as far as I know the name "France" came from the Frankish tribes who invaded the Region held by the Gauls ? tho AFAIK the language spoken by Charlemagne won't be understandable by the French nor the Germans right ?

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_w_
_w_

Frankish is a germanic language and both my language and german are believed to be derived from it. They settled in a variety of middle european countries not only france, their first seat of power was located in Doornik; Belgium.

French is ofc derived from latin and them gallo-romans actually made up most of the population compared to the franks, though the latter had most if not all power. Even after karel de grote they kept speaking their germanic language. Although "french" and "frankish" may seem similar, they shouldnt have much in commom ;)
Hope this wasnt too boring...'here, have a zoidberg;

Woop woop'woop (\ /) (;,,,;) (\/)

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ℱℓσℊℊℯɾ
ℱℓσℊℊℯɾ

Thanks for the info I personally like history especially the history of languages :)
Yeah now I remember French is like Italian, Portuguese Spanish, Romanian or Romance languages originaly developed from Latin .

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RighteousFighter
RighteousFighter

Addo that Charlemagnes failed campaign to Spain, The battles of Crecy and Agincourt, Louis IXs failed crusades, the crusade to Varna, the French defeat at Flanders during Italian wars, and Napoleons goof ups.

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murauder
murauder

I think this stereotype started when the French retreated from Russia during the Napoleonic wars.

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RighteousFighter
RighteousFighter

The stereotype common in USA definitely started post WW2.

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SolitaryMan
SolitaryMan

That awkward moment when there are just 8 comments but you spend an hour to read them all!

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attackmike
attackmike

even more so when you spend an hour using Wikipedia to check the facts

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ElfFriend
ElfFriend

So no any invading aliens will know Earth is ready for surrender right?

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Mr-Gency
Mr-Gency

You smell that? That's the smell of something getting burned. And the French getting owned.

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MasterofMetal
MasterofMetal

Out of all the countries in the world, the French have the most military victories of all. Can we PLEASE just get OVER the fact that the French surrendered in WWII?
ARE YOU OR ARE YOU NOT GLAD THAT THEY SAVED PARIS FROM BOMBS AND SUCH? ARE YOU PEOPLE HAPPY THAT YOU CAN LIVE, FOR A MOMENT, IN THE CITY OF LOVE? BE THANKFUL FOR THAT.
Frankly the US were worse than the French in WWII. Making profit off the war effort until the Japanese attacked. That's just being immoral. The French surrendered WWII because of the lack of competence in the command system: The generals focused on defensive strategies and trench warfare rather than tank designs and combat tactics.

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ℱℓσℊℊℯɾ
ℱℓσℊℊℯɾ

You sir win the day !

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BioDestroyer
BioDestroyer

I also never really understood this stereotype, they surrendered to save the cities and the civilians, but they kept fighting as the French Resistance. and they had a major role in assisting the Allies during the war.

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MasterofMetal
MasterofMetal

Thankyou, Flogger, BioDestroyer.
Has everyone else forgotten there were other countries that surrendered in WWII? Poland? Denmark? Norway? And what about the ones that went turncoat and switched to the other side? Finland? Italy? Where's their dose of dissing? Of all the traitors and cowards, you really must hate the French for no reason in particular. They were not the first country to surrender in a war, nor were they the last.
Just GET OVER it!

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ElfFriend
ElfFriend

Poland fought as long as possible if I remember right.

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MasterofMetal
MasterofMetal

France fought too, didn't it? The fact the Germans used blitzkrieg made it worse. At the time, the strategy was revolutionary. You could hardly be expected to come up with strategies to counter something that's never been thought of within a few days!
Anyway, surrendering has happened thousands of times across centuries. The act doesn't change. You could surrender when they're at your doorstep or you could surrender when they attack your borders and massacre troops. The act does not change. I could make fun of Japan surrendering, no? Or Italy? Or Argentina? Or Iraq/Iran? But I don't.

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murauder
murauder

Please, can you elaborate on how we did worse then?

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DiamondBorne
DiamondBorne

The French almost did conquered entire Europe in one generation with Napoleon and while they sure loves to Raise the white flag in major wars they strategically pull it off while they don't have any real advantage left (equal manpower/tech = equal chance of winning/losing = not worth it for them French) The American did it worse when they're losing to the spike pits and tunnel tactics used by those ****** backwater Vietcong :P

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ghostings
ghostings

Jesus Christ, why hasn't the comment section for this post taken 2 pages yet?

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