Most days are like all of the others,
Go to work, come back home, watch TV,
But, brother, if I had me druthers,
I'd chuck it and head out to sea,
For I dream of the skull and the crossbones,
I dream of the great day to come,
When I dump the mundane for the Old Spanish Main
And trade me computer for rum! ARRR!
T' me,
Yo, Ho, Yo, Ho,
It's "Talk Like A Pirate" Day!
When laptops are benches God gave us fer wenches,
And a sail ain't a low price ta pay!
When timbers are shivered and lillies are livered
And every last buckle is swashed,
We'll abandon our cars for a shipfull of ARRRs
And pound back the grog till we're sloshed! Yo ho....
Don't pick up yer phone and say "Hello,
Our ten-o-clock meeting's delayed",
Ye scrunch up yer face and ye bellow,
"AVAST! Ye've been bleedin' BELAYED!"
Ye can't keep this fun to yerself, I bet,
So sing "Aye!" "ARRR!" "Ayy!" every man!
We ain't got much grasp of the alphabet,
But a damn good retirement plan!
T' me,
Yo, Ho, Yo, Ho,
It's "Talk Like A Pirate" Day!
Whatever's in fashion is in for a thrashin'
And bein' polite is passe!
When it's ev'ry man's duty to grab his proud beauty
And let out a hearty YO HO!
And if this offends you, hold y'r breath as we sends you
Ta Davy Jones' Locker ya go! Yo ho....
We'll tell every banker "Heave to and weigh anchor!"
Buy latte with pieces of eight
We'll fight to be chosen as cap'n or bosun
The loser, o' course, is worst mate!
When we hoist Jolly Roger, the landlubbers dodge 'er,
We fill 'em with loathing and fear,
We'll plunder and pillage each city and village,
Or at least clean out Wal-Mart of beer!
There ain't no computin' or morning commutin',
No "Parking Lot Full" signs for me,
No lawns ta be mowin' or bills to be owin',
I'm knowin' the pull of the sea.
The fresh salty brace of the wind on my face
Through hurricane, sunshine or squalls,
I'm keepin' my eyes on the distant horizon,
Verizon can hold all my calls!
To wear a red coat full o' buckles,
To earn a few duelling scars,
Well, at least we can get a few chuckles
By filling the office with ARRRs!
And maybe we'll never get closer,
Than watchin' 'em on the big screen,
So here's to old Errol and Depp as Jack Sparrow,
And every damn one in between!
T' me,
Yo, Ho, Yo, Ho,
It's "Talk Like A Pirate" Day!
That time in September when sea dogs remember
That grown-ups still know how ta play!
When wenches are curvy and dogs are all scurvy
And a soft-wear patch covers your eye,
Ta hell with our jobs, for one day we're all swabs
And buccaneers all till we die!
So hoist up the mainsils and shut down your brain cells,
They only would get in the way,
Avast there, me hearty, we're havin' a party,
It's "Talk... Like... A Pirate" Day!
---
Words and Music: © 2003 by Tom Smith
Dedicated ta Cap'n Slappy an' Ol' Chumbucket,
fer creatin' National Talk Like A Pirate Day (September 19th)
Band: Alestorm
Album: Black Sails at Midnight
Song: Pirate Song
Genre: Pirate Metal
Lyrics:
Though you see me now a mere ghost of a man
I once had the heart of a lion
Commanded my ship between many a shore
The ol' Jolly Roger a-flyin
Mine was a name that struck fear into men
And regret into plenty of lasses
Oh, how I wish I could take back those days
As I stare at these empty beer-glasses
I think of the times past when I had it all
I toyed with men's wives and their daughters
And in my pursuit of this ill-gotten wealth
I stabbed and I slashed and I slaughtered.
And for what?
The men that I've fought
Are matched by the number of women I've bought
And for what?
I've killed and I've shot
And reddened the cold tears of children with blood
And If I could go back and make my amends
I'd make all those mistakes again
I'd kill every last one of those bastards, my friend
My ship was the last sight that many would see
As we narrowed the gap with our quarry
The sound of the cannons and splintering wood
Would herald our paths into glory
We seized all the bounty and scuppered the ship
Our hearts hadn't time for the wounded
I took my share and the crew got the rest
And on into port we then bounded
Life has many pleasures, and we had our fill
Of food and of wenches and beer
When we'd tired of the port or had drunken it dry
The time to set sail would come near
And for what?
We heeded no law
Made other men suffer so we could have more
And for what?
We lived every day
With the noose of the hangman a hair's breadth away
And If I could go back and make my amends
I'd make all those mistakes again
I'd kill every last one of those bastards, my friend
Oh I have seen wonders you'd never have dreamed,
And taken my fair share, I must say
Holds full of booty I happily seized
From crews who would not see a new day
Spanish gold came and went, gem stones got sold,
But I knew more lay on the horizon,
Yet the beer was too good and the gals were too sweet
And now in my old age it's gone
These memories were bought with the lives of good men
A price that I paid without scruple
So many souls suffered so I could get drunk
And swagger from brothel to brothel
And for what?
It's been many years
Yet the screams of the vanquished still ring in my ears
And for what?
I've blood on my hands
I wait for my place in the halls of the damned
And If I could go back and make my amends
I'd make all those mistakes again
I'd kill every last one of those bastards, my friend
