I'm a modder and mapper for the Goldsource engine, i mostly have made maps for Cry of Fear along with some skin editing.

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0 comments by ZikShadow on Mar 24th, 2015


My life is going through some shit currently...

In about the next 2 weeks i'm going to have my high school national final exam, of which the good or bad of the grades pretty much determines my utter fate.

If i managed to get myself into a college of which i would need to take another bunch of exams in, i would have to go far away from home to a boarding house near where the college is, due to how far away the bloody colleges are from my home.

Which means that i would need to find myself an actual job during my college years to help support myself alongside the money my dad would've gave me (Won't be enough though, he already has enough debt already, probably have to mortgage the family home), which is pretty shitty considering my nation's economy (Rp.1 here equals $0.000077 out there) and the serious difficulty of getting a good job with an actual balanced pay around here.

With probably way less internet use since there's absolutely no modem out there unless i use my small dinky phone, which means i won't be here a lot than when i was at home, nor modding other games in my probable massive lack of spare time.

And with the increase of criminal activity around here involving stealing, killing, robbing on the streets, house robbing, and a bunch of other stuff, i'm going to have to actually watch my back for real this time, even learning ways to defend myself with my hand would probably won't be enough since some of those criminals have actual guns.

My dad even had to send my sister far away to my dad's sister care, since he lack the monetary funds to support her and are currently suffering from stress taking care of our home ever since my mom left him.

I'm pretty much scared and feeling anxious at this situation, i've never had to face a wall of problems like these before, and somewhat worried that nobody can really help me in the thing that is the world outside of my general area before.

So, if any of you guys are wondering about any other mods i'm working on or such, assume that they're on hiatus for until i can get back to my home and continue modding in my spare time, which i assume is about 3-4 years from now.


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witeczek23 Feb 19 2015, 9:21am says:

Hey it's great that you started to re-do the TOD, but it would be way cooler if you could port it into the source engine, and let guys who does not have HL1 (request from me friends) could play it, and intrest somebody to start server on it.
Keep up the great work

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