The Funny Thread Thread

I thought it would be a good idea to have a thread dedicated to telling jokes and making people laugh.

Feel free to use your ™ weapons in here, but you must bow down to the Giant Inflatable Hand.

Remember: Please do not talk in this thread if you want to say something unfunny or uninteresting.

I'll start with...

A Scotsman, an American, a Forum Poster and a useless Spammer are all on a train. The Scotsman pulls a bottle of whiskey from his pocket... (big pocket) takes two swigs and chucks the rest out of the window of the moving train.
useless Spammer says: why did you do that?
Scotsman says: we have so much whiskey in Scotland that no one will miss one bottle.
The useless Spammer accepts this explaination. Later, the American pulls a big fat cigar from his pocket, has two drags and throws the rest of the cigar out of the window.
useless Spammer says: does america have a lot of cigars?
American says: america has more than enough cigars for one or two to be wasted
The useless Spammer accepts this explaination. Later the Forum Poster gets up, grabs hold of the useless Spammer and throws him out of the window.

*me looks embarrased for telling pathetic joke

...but can you do better?

- Edited By arvey-Haynos On Wed 16th, Apr 2003 @ 5:21:01pm

-What did the penis say to the condom?
-Cover me! I am going in!

lol... that's a good one.

how many hippies does it take to screw in a lightbulb.

101

1 to screw it in and 100 to sit around him saying "I believe in you, man"

*DarkPredator draws SSJ Goku and claims it's great
<CheapAlert> That's the spikiest testicle i've ever seen.

i don't really understand what you're talking about but it was funny none the less

Your momma is So stank
She used Secret and it told on her!

How many Microsoft employees does it take to screw in a lightbulb?

Joke has performed an illegal operation and will be shut down.

- Edited By jacksonj04 On Wed 16th, Apr 2003 @ 5:40:49pm

Macintosh has to be an acronym for somethin...

Machine Always Crashes If Not The Operating System Hangs.

arvey-Haynos wrote: i don't really understand what you're talking about but it was funny none the less

Dark Predator, behold...
Cheap was the one who started the Anit DP movement and thread.

I have a funny joke, but I'm going to try and find where I posted it before...because I sure as hell don't want to type it all out.

i have 1 also but i need to find it

find it!

Yeah, LyNx will find it in his lil' book fair.

im trying!
any way heres sumthin when ur wating(i know its stupid but whatever)
What did the fast tomato say 2 the slow tomato?
Ketchup!

i was just lookin through 1 of my hundreds of joke books

it was terrible

And they all suck, we've all grown out of the chicken and road cliches.

not mine!
mine was 1337

Chickenjoke.com

whyd the chicken cross the road?

it was on the wrong side to begin with

lol

Wazat's got alot of decent jokes in his collection, go PM him to tell us some. Note that 8% of them are immature, which is a good thing

exactly 8%... becuase if theres 9% there'll be hell to pay

- Edited By arvey-Haynos On Mon 19th, Apr 2004 @ 6:27:39pm