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OK, so I have a dark sense of humor ... if you don't enjoy a little tongue in cheek feel free to go take a selfie.
While I don't accuse Polaroid of intentionally designing a mechanism to dumb people down when the first self-timer was added to a camera, I think the empirical evidence is compelling enough to warrant investigation into the long term effects.
It is hard to deny that since the self-timer was invented the proliferation of stupid people has greatly increased. I am convinced that if Marie Antionette had been born in the 1950's instead of the 1750's she would have said "If the people have no bread, let them take selfies"
Apple's ability to use the brain damaging effect of selfies to accelerate the process of dumbing down the masses to where they willingly accept not only price gouging but tying themselves to a wall outlet is pure marketing genius. A fly on the wall in the board room might have heard 'But if they have to charge their phones every 2 hours instead of every 48 the batteries will wear out like 10 times faster and they will need to buy a new phone ... oooh, I get it ;) ' (his parents loved the self timer ... more evidence?)
The casual acceptance of deaths caused while texting and driving and people stepping in front of trains and cars while proving how photogenic they are is not at all outside the margin of acceptable losses in the corporate environment. The rubberneckers will take selfies as they pass the bodies and the market will continue to grow.
I heard there was a bill in Congress (Narcissus Bill) to introduce subliminal advertising (flashing a frame of "Stupid people shouldn't breed') into the moving pictures Apple introduced but Obama vetoed it. While I couldn't agree more with the ad, I think taxing selfies would be a better solution for the next administration to eliminate the national debt.
Unlike the 'temporary tolls and taxes' municipalities sell to the selfie crowd and then find never ending reasons to continue, a tax on selfies would pay off the national debt and then fade away if they manage to make them cause sterility too.
Doubtless some PC bores will find my humor offensive, but I wish them no ill. There is a nice reflective puddle out there somewhere they can take a selfie at ;)
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I want to fabricate a pair of grenades as a joke. Publish it as a temporary patch for those wanting less effective grenades.
I want to nerf them so they do No damage and change the sound effects and visuals to something like a 5 meter cloud of glitter and taunts of 'Get out of here Stalker' and Friendship is Magic in a falsetto voice ringing in your ears. Being able to change the helmet hud view to cover it with glitter would be a great touch too.
I suck at photoshop or I would do a cartoon with a noob in the bar covered in glitter and two veterans talking
"What happened to him?"
"The cyka taunted the wrong bandits and they hit him with a Friendship is Magic grenade; I hear the glitter even glows in the dark and can't be removed"
":O"
Can anyone help me LOL