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For a better fun, read this with comedian voice type.

Posted by CommanderDef on Nov 17th, 2012

This year I started on university. A big city, different lifestyle. I never missed my parents, so it turned out to be good for my ego, haha. I was that kind of student who rather comes every day to every lesson, but never learn until it's needed. On university it is different. First of all, there are lots of us, we don't even know each other yet. And all we learn this semester is math, math and mechanics... ...and math.

After some (very short) time I found lectures boring. I understood what teacher says, but when he started with mathematical proofs, my attention was somewhere else. Body sitting on uncomfortable place with mind fleeing around. 

Some day in early October: Mood on 10%, some kind of black magic on the blackboard...

"Come on, forget about daydreaming, find something better." This first voice is always what you want,  but never get to anything, because of the second one, which is the mirror of reality. I don't give them names, and I guess you don't too, because it would seems that you are COMPLETELY crazy, but for purpose of this story, let's call them Smile and Grumble.
"Like what? You must sit here and pretend watching. Usual way is to get to daydream... so where did we finished last time?"
"No, daydreaming is not exciting anymore, after you became almost almighty. Come on, let's try something else."
"Do YOU have an idea, hmm?" Grumble never thinks alone, he just like to criticize.
"Let me think... how many people do you know here? There are 200 people in this room now."
"1, 2, 3, ... 14, maybe 15."
"And do you want to know others?"
"Mmm, should I? I suppose I would like to... but I can't talk now."
"Ok, so here is the game. Pick one randomly and find out something about him."
"Him??? Oh, I almost forget, there are only few girls here... And since they all have boyfriends, it would be weird."
"Yes, and it would be less trouble if the guy notice anything. Maybe he will find it funny too."
"Ok, so how do we start?" 
"You really agree? Really? Great! I haven't seen you so excited for a long, looong time. Even not when you defeated all your friends in all games, when you served as agent..."
"Because that wasn't real. This has at least some connection to reality."
Grumble always says just "it's not real, how can you enjoy it so much? It bullshit, BULLSHIT!".

/// ∑ aibk... ///

Time to move from lecture to practice. We are more than 400 people divided into 20 groups. Lectures are in large rooms, for more groups. Practise and exercise lessons are mostly just for one group and they are in smaller rooms. When I moved out trough the door, I almost hit a guy who wanted to go inside. 

"So I guess we have chosen." Smiley shined. "Let's find out his name, without asking anyone."
"Him??? He looks like he will kill us! No, totally wrong idea... I don't want to have anything with this madness." 

The guy was tall, thin, with short black hair. For some reason if I saw him in dark street, I would speed up my stroll. And apparently, he was Russian, or some kind of russian speaking country. That turned the tide. I like strangers, that's one of the reasons I am on moddb after all. And it should be easy to find his name. Grumble admitted it. Mood on 65%. They didn't know there are at least 4 Russian speaking strangers in every group. In my group there is only one left now. They use the school to get visa and don't show for the all time. Not only russians, but all kinds of strangers do it this way. I wasn't used to see so many, since I am from small town. But as I said, big city comes with new things.

Because they didn't want to get themselves killed, they just stopped by watching for the guy in large lecture rooms. If he was present, they compared their schedule with schedule of top favorites. It didn't turn out well, mood decreased. And it took few weeks, since we had really different
"So you won't survive as private eye, your career is finished before it started" usual pesimism returned to Grumble's voice.
"Yeah, it is harder, above my expectations. But now it's challenge, you must not give up!"
"We have so many possibilities... no, we won't find out."
Mood decreased to 20%...

\sigma_V = \frac{\pid^2}{2}\sigma_d=0,36~cm^3

It took too long and I would finally give up, but then the security awareness lecture came. It is compulsory and everybody has to sign a paper, so they know who came. 

"I found him, on the left side, and he will have the papers before you." Smile got adrenalin boost.
"Ok, now focus. There are three parts. One is certainly for A-K names, second K-R and third R-Z. Or similar, but I guess you got the meaning." Grumble was also excited.
"I see. He has his black ballpoint pen, so all you have to do is to find black signature next to russian name. It's soooo eeeaaasyyyy!!! You can't miss" Smile almost danced.
Mood on 90%.
"Oh, here it is, here it is, come to the daddy, hahaha..." as three sheets came to my hand. But then my neighbor took the first one. He knew my name starts with M. Only fast glance at paper going quickly away from my sight. I found the signature, but I couldn't read it. The last name started with A and I wasn't sure about first name starting with A on N. 

"Fuck you, you dirty little something, you just screwed and you don't even know how much! I hate you, I was so close! SO CLOOOSE!! NOOOO!"

The rest of this lecture they spent arguing whoose fault it is. Mood very close to zero. Grumble came with idea about revenge, but logic hold him. 
"He don't even know what he did, you can't punish him." Smile wasn't smiling at all.
"But, sso, so close," Grumble sobbed, "I want him to die, I really do."
"Perhaps we can make without this. We know his last name starts with A, right? That can't be many people." 

He was wrong. Nearly all guys from top list were starting on A. Grumble wanted to commit suicide. That's nothing so unusual, considering he is the pesimistic part, but suddenly there was nobody to cheer him up. Later the lecturer shouted out few people for loud talking, it brought some happiness in his black heart. 

So they stopped on guess. They chose the name they would give the guy and pretended it is the right one. In weeks time they got some clues and could guess again. There was a name all the clues pointed on, but it was written in a group of Nuclear-Chemical engeneering and that would mean completely different schedule than "The Guy" had. It was strange. I couldn't work it out.

14th November was the special day, although it wasn't apparent at the beginning. Mechanic is usually the most boring lecture. It consists of one equation, which adjustments take about 2 hours. Desperate. And those brains around me can understand it and even find mistakes the professor made. I decided not to wake up for those lessons in Thursday morning, but in Wednesday I have something before it.

/// d2f/dt2 = αẍ + βẋ + ... ///

So I am sitting in the large room, watching the professor coming and hearing he says something. It didn't sound like physics. Even not like more_physics. I focused my ears. I heard him saying:
"I'd like to know how many people are coming to my lecture and from which groups. Please, sign here and add your groups description..."

"Gotcha. Sixth sign, black ballpoint pen, russian name." 
"But what if somebody screw it again?"
"Don't be so grumbly... Just wait for it. Just be calm. Just..."
"Smiley! You are not calm. You are obsessed. You should rather had stayed with daydreams."
"It's just few meters of us and you are so cruel now? After everything we have done together?"
"Smiley, it's just a name, nothing more..."
"Oh, it's here, it's here!! Sixth sign, black ballpoint pen, that's correct and the name. The name. THE NAME!"

My mind was dancing. "Who's the boss? I am so awesome, I did it. Fuck you, my neighbor, fuck all those people standing in my way. Who's the beast? I am!!! I'm so awesome I can't be better, I am...

For those who like memes, imagine that "fuck yeah" one, multiply by "n" where "n" is going to plus_infinity.

Mood on 99%, adrenaline very high. I am not sure if I managed to keep my real face without grinning. Well, it could be interesting to look at me in that moment. Then I just smiled for few minutes until the euphoria went out. I am so awesome... so awesome... mood is suddenly decreased. And rate of decreasment is increasing... What's that? What's happening? I should be happy! 
I got bored. Sigh. BORED!!!

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