I'm replaying Enderal, a total conversion for Skyrim. I found it well-made, with a gripping story, great characters, and excellent music. I got a whole bunch of mods for my next playthrough, and one adds in a journal one can write in to record thoughts, events, etc. I'll be keeping this journal up as I play, and I figured it would be fun to share it here.
Heartfire, 16th, 4E 8234
Decided to get an early start and head out to the markets. It’s always good to see if anyone’s got anything useful lying around. Usually they don’t, but it’s still relaxing nonetheless. A bit of a reminder that we’re all still living, I suppose.
I talked to the bartender in the Dancing Nomad. Jespar came in really early in the morning. Apparently he was out of sorts, drinking until the bartender kicked him out. He told me to look around the other inns if I want to find him. Part of me thinks it’s best to just leave him alone. But if he’s really this bad, I need to track him down. Dal’Geyss can wait just a bit longer.
I’m fucking sick of this shit. On my way through the South Quarter, I saw a gibbet. Halyss Summerstone was hanging from it. He’s the farmer Calia and I caught a while back with the bandits. His daughter was weeping in front of the body.
Walking through the Undercity, I’ve got the same feeling. This place pisses me off. I can’t do anything about it right now, but at some point soon, I’m going to go on the warpath. For the Summerstones, for Jespar’s family, and for everyone else the Rhalata have fucked over. I’m going to burn them all.
Fuck, Jespar’s in bad shape. I found him in a whorehouse in the Undercity, half-addled and barely coherent from all the glimmerdust and alcohol. Part of me wanted to just slap some sense into him, honestly. But… I don’t know. He told me I shouldn't be shocked – he wants to fancy himself this unconcerned sellsword who would abandon his friends without a second thought. That’s what he thinks he is.
He told me about how he left Lysia. She’s the one he traveled with before we met. Long story short, their camp got attacked by bandits and he ran – didn’t hesitate to leave her behind. He only went back once they had finished her off. And that’s what gives him away.
See, he carries her dagger. He uses it as a parrying knife, and he keeps it close. It’s a memento. He says he didn’t care about her, but he did. He says he doesn’t care about Adila’s death, but he’s lying. If that were true, her sword wouldn’t have been propped against the wall.
I told him that he needs to pull himself together and stop drowning in self-pity. At some point he’s going to have to face the fact that he’s not as bad as he thinks he is. I think that’s what he’s afraid of. It’s why he’s fucked up right now. Adila’s death made him think again that he actually has people he cares about.
I can’t help him. This is something he’s going to have to sort out on his own. I gave him my thoughts, but it’s up to him to listen to them. If there were more I could do, I’d do it, but there’s not. I left him alone with his whores. I hope he comes around eventually.
Anyways, I can’t really put off the hunt for the Black Stone any longer. I’m not anticipating too much trouble, but you never know. But maybe I’ll piss Dal’Geyss off and he’ll sick the Rhalata on me. That would save me the trouble of hunting them down, at least. We’ll see.
Link to Enderal. It's important to note that the writing above is based almost entirely on the story created by an extraordinarily talented group of modders. Credit is due to them, not to me. I would also be remiss to not credit Arcones for the idea of using a parchment-looking background to add some flavor.
