What you wouldnt want to hear over a BC-304's Com System Thread - ModDB Stargate Fan Group

okay here's a couple

"Attention Crew..... Does anyone have a map?, if so please report to...umm.... where the hell am I???"

"I can see my house from here.... HEY! that guy pulled the finger at me... Marks" "Yes Sir..." "Fire when ready"

"Attention Crew..... We are 1 day's flight from Atlantis...and" SLAP "And if people dont keep their hands to themselves were turning right around and heading back to Earth"

Funny, here's a couple:

"Oops"

"Wow...that can't be good"

"I hope you said 'goodbye' to your loved ones, cuz you won't see them again for LONGGGGGG time."

Here's a few more:

• "Damn it, how do you put this back together?"
• "Attention Crew...Vala's holding another party, attendance is compulsory."
• "Does anyone know how to disarm the self-destruct?"
• "Has anyone seen the keys?"

Automated voice "Thankyou for pressing the self destruct button..... this ship will self destruct in three minutes"

Automated voice "Thankyou for pressing the self destruct button..... in exaclty two minutes and 45 seconds"

Colonel Sanders "attention this is Colonel Sanders of Forward command... Abandon ship, Abandon ship all personnel proceed to escape pods, close down the circus, evacuate the zoo... self-destruct mechanism have been activated, Abandon ship"

Automated voice "this is your two minute warning... this ship will self destruct in exactly two minutes"

Colonel Sanders "launch all escape pods as soon as they are filled"

one minute and forty seconds later

Automated voice "This ship will self destruct in twenty seconds... this is your last chance to press the cancellation button"

Automated voice "this ship will self destruct in exactly ten seconds"

Automated voice "counting down 10... 9.... 8.... 6...."

President "SIX... what happened to seven?"

Automated voice "Just kidding.... 6.... 5.... 4.... 3.... 2.... 1.... Have a nice day"

Thankyou

Gotta Love SPACEBALLS

how about,

"YES I fired, see I'm holding the fire button...Why does that comm one is on? Oh.."

"3....2....1....would the owner of the silver Pontiac firebird...Oh never mind 0!!!!"
Seriously, you have to love Futurama. Here's another great line from the same episode:
Brain 1: "Well, here we are, trapped for all eternity"
Brain 2: "We could sing American Pie?"

"These is not the humans you are looking for"

he he, starwars.

"attention all crew if youd look out of the starboard side of the ship you will see a super hive.... and if you look out the left you'll see me escaping in the only puddle jumper...... Also we ran out of 302 fuel a long time ago so.... yeah.... have fun"

"Attention crew, has anyone seen the missing kull warrior?"

"Ah, well *BLEEP*.......*static*"

BTW, I meant "These are not the humans you are looking for."

"ok lads, good news. The wraith are throwing a charity dinner and we are all invited!"

dude, it should be "The wraith said they would like to have us over for dinner, but I don't why yet"

yeah, but where's the fun in there??
I can picture the faces of the crew hearing the captain giving the "good news"

"Marks, I can see my house!"

As last words;
"Thats not a super hive."

"This is the captain speaking, does anyone know to test how drunk I am?"

"Um, guys, is the red light a good thing?"