Also known as "Marcusyaho" Action/horror gamer and level designer. I can help you with more or less any Amnesia scripting and Level editor problems. I'm also available if you need a map tester

Review RSS Feed The Chemical Factory
3 Review

Mod Review on Mar 3rd, 2014 - 2 people agree 1 person doesn't

Positives:

- Not a regular "you wake up in an unkown castle" story
- No lame jumpscares
- Music

Negatives:

- 95% key quests
- Plain, no details, boring and repeditive gameplay
- Short story and very smal maps
- Missing ceiling in the flooded map and the water texture made no sense
- Notes made no sense
- Lame and rushed ending

What to improve:

Mapping:

While the levels are relativly free from texture glitches, the maps in this story are very empty and have no details at all. It seems like you were lazy and placed a couple of barrels somewhere and then just copied them because they are all placed and rotated the same way everywhere.

The flooded map. First of all, it was extremly obvious that a water monster was coming, but what really got my attention where your texture selection and missing ceiling. Why does it look like it's a river? It's inside a house...

Both the archive and "chemical lab" were so extremly rushed and lame. The archive - wow, two bookshelfs and the same book copied like 7 times, magically floating on the water surface.

"Chemical lab" - no chemicals what so ever and the monsters left a button which could destroy the whole facility if you click on it (TV cartoons in a nutshell). You should also add pillars at the end of walls so we can't see through them.

Add more than just key quests, please. And the crowbar (during the crowbar quest) is placed at the wrong side of the door.

Notes:

The first note is made by me, right? So, why did I write it and then picked it up? Makes no sense. The two notes in the mansion map made no sense either to be honest. Looked like an advanced puzzle. Turned out all I had to do was finding a key.

Conclusion:

You though of a story and it wasn't bad for a first made CS, but I rate all stories the same way and to be honest, this one was boring and empty. I decided to give it a 3/10 anyway though because it's a good start and you have potential.

3/10 - Bad

Feast of the Damned
3 Review

Mod Review on Feb 18th, 2014 - 1 person doesn't

Since you told us it is going to be a troll story full of jumpscares, I'm not going to rate it a low score simply because it was a jumpscare story. But...

Positives:

- It was scary sometimes
- A few creative areas

Negatives:

- Level design is boring and repetitive (with exception of the big grunt head part)
- 80% chase of monsters are in chase scenes
- Only key quests
- No story at all except for a brief description
- Low creativity (when it comes to quests, story etc)
- Short

Conclusion:

Boring, repetitive and if you hate jump feasts and troll humour, a huge waste of time.

3/10 - Bad

Amnesia: Sanctum Escaping
3 Review

Mod Review on Feb 11th, 2014 - 1 person agrees 2 people don't

Positives:

- Good level design at some places
- Custom sounds
- Creativity

Negatives:

- Floating objects, glitches and lame mapping at certain places
- Short
- Nothing but jumpscares
- No real story line except "you must get out" which is overused
- Monsters spawned infront of my face
- The exploding part made no sense

What to improve:

- You guys are very creative, but a lot of items are floating in the air, a lot of textures are glitchy (colliding with each other), and certain parts are just lame. Like when you crawl through a tunnel and see a level door at the end of it.

- Don't use only jumpscares. I am so used to them so I did not get scared even once, but I'm sure a lot of people were by the first 1-3 jumpscares, but eventually even scared players gets used to them.

- Make something else rather than the same old "you wake up at an unknown place, you must get out".

-"Read Nicholas notes, he will tell you where to go". Found 2 notes from him, and none of them really told me what to do.

Conclusion:

It's just another jumpscare feast with lame scares and monsters spawning infront of your face. Some people said "the scripting is good". I barley saw any scripting except the quests and jumpscares. And it's not very surprising when the script files are 1-8KB huge at most.

The difference between this story and other lame jumpscare stories is the level design. Sadly though, I found a lot of floating items and texture glitches.

It's simply a bad story, not more, not less.

3/10 - Bad

Larry's Life - Part 2
3 Review

Mod Review on Dec 24th, 2013 - 2 people agree

Positives:

- Creativity
- Nice ideas I guess

Negatives:

- Catherine is a guy
- Same voice actor for every character, including Catherine
- Extremly short
- No challange
- Just like part one, horrible scares that isn't even scary (at least not more than once)

Conclusion:

As much as I love the fact that you try to make something else rather than the same old "monsters kidnapped you, you must get out", this story is bad. Plain and simple.

The voice acting need improvements. And most importantly, don't use the same actor for every character...

The level design is average, but need way more details to be considered as good. The only quests in the story is basicly finding keys (I said you are creative and for the most parts you are, but seriously, you use the same "I need a sparekey to the bedroom" in both the houses). What I am trying to say is, there is no challange at all.

The scares are just lame and overused. I did personally not get scared even once, but I guess most people were... the first time. Then they got used to them just like I did. They simply don't work very well.

And dude come on... "Catherine" and I see a naked guy with a ***** speaking with a male voice. *Facepalm*.

----------

The reason why I rate this one 3 and not 4 like the first part is because the first one actually had a bigger variation of quests (they were bad and simple as well, but at least you used more than keys) and because it seems like you spent a little bit longer on the mapping itself. Other than that, this one disapointed me just as much as part one.

You have huge potential. You just need to spend more time on your work. This part came out less than a month after the first part (and it shows).

3/10 - Bad

In da house - Chapter One
3 Review

Mod Review on Sep 3rd, 2013

Positives:

- Grunt scared me
- Design is okay (except for some minor mistakes and lack of details)

Negatives:

- Extremely short
- Absolutely no story at all
- No challange

Conclusion:

What is there to jugde here? The story is 3 minuts long :/. The very short gameplay contained some decently good level design (at least the apartment. The staircase was however bland and had some minor mistakes, like missing weldars at the stairs).

The grunt was a bit scary though because I was hoping I could run further up. I was wrong. I jumped past him like a ninja and crawled into a corner in hope he would go away. Lukcily it was enough.

To be honest, it's a very boring story because it barley is a story in this.

3/10 - Bad

Amnesia:The House Of The Devil
3 Review

Mod Review on Aug 31st, 2013 - 2 people agree 1 person doesn't

Positives:

- Attempt to create a storyline
- Some decent scares
- The puzzles were harder than expected

Negatives:

- Lame monster encounters
- The story is weak and illogical in many ways
- A lot of level design fails
- How am I supposed to unlock the desk door?
- You can interact with the grass at the first map, making it really buggy

- What did I need the silver key in the dining room for?
- I entered the dungeon and the door I came through disappeared?
- I had to cheat to beat the devil
- Your english can be highly improved

Conclusion:

I played your first story and it was bad. You said this one was supposed to be better but I can honestly not see a huge difference. Your first story had a naked guy, this one didn't, although this story had monsters that appeared in front of my face for no reason, no billboards like your first story, a lot of level design mistakes and nothing make sense whatsoever.

What I'm trying to say is, you improved some things while some other things are worse than your first story. It seems like you learned something and forgot about other things.

3/10 - Bad

CinnamonToastKen' Escape Part 1
3 Review

Mod Review on Aug 28th, 2013 - 2 people agree
This review may contain spoilers

This story is so short so I might as well type down my gameplay

I spawned inside a cell and a key is lying on the floor infront of me. It's, ofcourse, unlocking the celldoor (You lock someone in but leave a key so he can get out? I see no logic in that). I find a key after a while and a grunt spawns. I only had 1.5 sec to hide so he saw me at first. Luckily he gave up. I unlocked the level door with the key.

I find the celler in the house I just went into.

End of chapter 1

I go deeper into the cellar (with only 2 rooms), I pick up the key and a water monster surprisingly spawn behind me. I jumped past him, went back to the house and chapter 2 ends.

I unlock a room with the key I found and picks up another key lying on the floor. A naked guy appears infront of my face for no reason in a pathetic attempt to scare me. Fails miserably.

I unlock the house entrance with the key.

End of story.

----------------------------------------

The only reason why I give you 3/10 instead of 1 like most stories like this one deserves is because I actually see potential in you. You used music, billboards, working monster with path nodes and some scripting. In short, you, unlike most people that create stories for a certain youtuber, friend etc, tried to create a story. It just failed.

Next time:

Work alot more on the level design! You actually have a decent start, but there's too many texture glitches and lack of details. Maps are also too short in my opinion.

More and better scares! Naked guys that appears from nowhere = not a good idea!

More challange! You have nothing but key quests.

And a much longer story! This took me 5 minuts to complete.

-----------------------------------

Because you tried and didn't overuse lame jumpscares, here you go.

3/10 - Bad

0 Calories
3 Review

Mod Review on Aug 8th, 2013 - 2 people agree 2 people don't

Positives:

- Creative
- A few good scares
- A few decent areas

Negatives:

- What is this story even about?!
- As said, some areas are decently nice, but most of them bland
- I ran to the other end of the first map for no reason at all and was forced to ran back
- Obviously made by a 8 year old with this lame humour

Conclusion:

What the hell is this "story" about? No notes, no flashbacks not even a description! What is the story about? I really don't know... I went from one random map to another over and over again.

Your humour is worse than a 10 year olds... "ketchup", "u ******? u ******?" loading pictures of, I don't know, and ofcourse, like any other lame stories you have pewdiepie references.

In short - I have no motivation for this story, nor any hope to see it getting anywhere when it comes to popularity.

As said, you have a decent level design (sometimes), you are very creative and this is better than your first one. But this is Amnesia! This is the opposite of what Amnesia is all about.

3/10 - Bad

The house
3 Review

Mod Review on Jul 14th, 2013 - 5 people agree

Another basic story with flying naked guy scare and very low effort put into it. It's not recommended in it's current state

Positives:

- The level design is better than I expected, but can be much better
- Attempt to create a story line
- You know how to do simple scrips such as "look at" "key quests" and messages

Negatives:

- Bad story line
- No music, details, mementos (not needed in this story, but still), almost no notes
- Boring and bland level design
- Only two scares and both of them cheap
- Flying naked guy
- Very short

Conclusion:

This is a 2/10 at most due to the extrem basics and lame scares, but the flying naked guy ******** was not overused in this story and I see potential in you so I'm giving you 3/10

Next time:

- Create a better story! Why would you be worried because the others are gone? Only reason why I would be worried is if we decided they would stay for the night, otherwise why would you be worried? You wen't to sleep so the part was obviously over.

- Make it longer! I took me 5-10 minuts to finish this and that is not enough. A decently long story is 30 minuts up to 2-3 hours long.

- Be a bit more creative! Add more details to your maps, don't use only keys because players don't feel motivated when they know exactly what to look for the whole time.

- Copy someones crowbar quest because putting the crowbar on the door and it blows up without actually moving the crowbar looks pretty lame and rushed.

- DON'T use flying naked guy scares! A majority of players hate them, they are overused, lame and predictable and ruin the athmopshere.

- Add music and other ambient sounds.

3/10 - Bad

Last Battle
3 Review

Mod Review on Jun 18th, 2013 - 2 people agree
This review may contain spoilers

Positives:

- A few creative areas and ideas
- Not only keyquests (although all the quests are simple)
- Texts
- I did expect naked guys or other lame jumpscares. None (good job on that part)
- Decently good level design for a new mapper
- I see potential in you

Negatives:

- Low music variation
- Bad lightning (no boxlights for example)
- Really lame story line
- Way too short
- Billboards! But it seems like you got tired of them and stopped using them after awhile. And dark blue/purple billboard lights coming from white/yellow windows? Seriously dude?

- Description said 1950, suddenly it's 1970, I don't get it
- A note said "a monster killed me after I typed this note" or something like that. Grammar, time and logical errors in that line alone.
- And the point with the chemical was?
- Grunt refuse to leave (no "stop" trigger)

- "Ruuun" text. I think it's twice as scary when you have to realize you are being chased by yourself. But it's my own opinion so no points removed. I'm just saying.
- Horrible english (my english is bad as well, but there is a line between bad and horrible. This was a disaster. Even google translate is better)

Conclusion:

It's a really bad story, but for a first story, it's decent. Alot of work is required but I see alot of potential in you. You did not use any lame naked guys scares and you have a certain level of creativity.
So I'm giving it a 3/10. Keep practising, keep testing your way to sucess, and most importantly, be even more creative and a good luck for future stories :)

3/10 - Bad