I don't know what these guys smoked, but
a) the Cave/Caroline/Chell picture resembling Eli/Azian/Alyx one: I already told that. "Seriously, I found this picture at Vance Subprime Incorporated."
b) I (as of insanely recently) DO own Portal.
c) Even though Portal: The 4th Millennium Wiki does claim my birth date is made up, it is real. April 30, 1996.
d) The "my" photo is old. Here's a more recent one: Img830.imageshack.us
Period.
Removed all the comments for the time when people can figure out what is trolling and what isn't.
Some random guy:
"Trolling is the future, and the future starts with you."
:D