GLORIOUS HISTORY OF THE BEST TANK GROUP EVER CREATED

Narrator:
Khm...khm... Nobody knows when the first tank lovers appeared. Modern History states, that once ancient tribes of tank lovers inhabited the whole world. The bones of the first tank lovers were found in the eastern Russia and dated from 3978 B.C. Nevertheless historians are still arguing where the first tank lovers appeared. Some of them state that the first tank lovers appeared in western Europe, among common german tribes, others say that they appeared in boundless steppes of Russia, the 3rd are sure that the first tank lovers came from the North... At those severe times, tribes of tank lovers were wild, isolated and fought with each other. They didn't even know the differencies between T-34 and Sherman, IS and Tiger tanks, ERA and cage armor...
But such ignorance could not exist forever! Sooner or later this outstanding day should happen! It happened on the 11th of September 2009 A.C. somewhere in Eastern Europe, in the territory of modern Slovakia. A strong leader came to the rule in the one of the most militant tank lovers tribe. vlado32 was his name. He destroyed all his internal opposition inside the tribe and concentrated the whole power in one hands. He had an idea of reunification of all tank lovers in the world. Historians are still retelling with excitement his legendary speech when he climbed on IS-2 tank: "COMRADES!!! Hard times came to our Motherland! Ignorant tank lovers leaders fight with each other, aggressive nomad tribes of tank hunters want to annihilate us. But I look in future with optimism! I believe that now we will start to write the history! It is a day of our destiny! "cries from the crowd" It is a day when we will overturn the world! "loud cries and applause" It is a day when we will overthrow the rule of pigmy tribal leaders! "ovations" We will unite all the tank lovers in the world! We will live in prosperity! I know that today we have only few tanks and we are outnumbered, but we will reach the times when we will have hundreds of tanks! "crowd is getting mad" I promise a personal tank for everyone..." crowd triumphed. His last words disappeared in cries...
And he began to invade the nearest tribes of tank lovers. There were a lot of tribes which wanted to join to vlado32, but there were even much more of those who didn't want to obey. Terrifying...khm..."drinking a glass of water"...khm...Terrifying civil war between tank lovers outbroke. But the situation became even worse. Unlimited forces of wild and aggressive nomad tank hunter and common tank haters also wanted to destroy young group. They were using guerilla tactics and were walking with RPG-7 here and there. Losses of tank lovers were horrific. Dark times came to the tank lovers group. The future of the group was nebulous...
At the same time, new tank lovers commander joined the forces of tank lovers. It happened on the 26th of September 2009 A.D. His name was flogger. True tank lover, skillful diplomat, he was born in the family of true tank lovers. Historians state that even his gran-gran-gran-gran parents were tank lovers. He came from the South and brought new army of tanks lovers with him. He estimated the situation very quickly. He understood that without the help from outside they will never win this bloody war, and the tank lovers group will be finished...
The situation for group became dolefully. Each day tank lovers lost their ground, casualties were increadible. Dark clouds thickened above the group. The disaster was so close as never before...
One day after one more terrifying defeat, vlado32 and flogger gathered for the war council.
- vlado, the situation is critical. We won't stay long in this situation. We have to change our strategy...

- I know my friend. I've already ordered to start the expedition to outer lands, and you will lead these brave tank lovers in this fateful mission. You should find our comrades in far lands and bring them here...
At the end of September when flogger was already far from the heart of the group, bad news have come. vlado32 disappeared without a trace. Last defenders of the group were destroyed. The anarchy triumphed in the group...The spirit of the tank lovers was broken...
Long, cold days flogger and his true followers were wandering around the world searching for their comrades...Everyone was in subdued spirit. And then, suddenly, on the 8th of October 2009 A.D...The help has come from the place nobody expected. The savior has come from the severe territories of the east. ComeradeStalin was his name. He was a leader of harsh tank lovers, true steel men, who fought with tank-hunters for many ages. Many years ago all tanks of ComeradeStalin's family were burnt by tank hunters, and since those times, abhorrence to tank haters sits strictly in his blood. He swore to annihilate all tank-hunters everywhere in the world. He was glad to join flogger's holy crusade against pathetic tank hunters, and hundreds of his followers as well. Long and hard homecoming expected for our heroes... And vlado32 still kept silence...
..."cough"...Khm...
On their way home they encountered heavy resistance of ignorant and wild tribes of tank lovers and numerous forces of tank hunters. But there were even more of those who wanted to join this crusade! Each day the strength and spirit of tank lovers were getting stronger and stronger. The might of true tank lovers grew with each passing day. Once splayed fingers - today they became a mighty fist, which destroyed all their enemies. With iron and blood, ComeradeStalin united all tank lovers tribes. The battle of the age was oncoming! The army of True Tank Lovers, against the army of Tank Hunters. The ground was trembling when these two superpowers commenced the Fight. Rivers of burning fuel from destroyed tanks filled the battlefield! The balance of the forces was unsteady, nobody knew who will win and who will lose? Who will triumph and who will fall to Oblivion? Both sides were ready to fight to the last drop of fuel and to the last cumulative shell. And..."cough"..."cough"...khm...khm... And, when nobody already expected this, vlado32 with his followers returned back from the exile and broke through the enemy line. Enemy formations were broken, frontline of tank hunters was crumpled. Three giant groups of tank hunters were clamped between heavy tanks of ComeradeStalin and vlado32. Enemies began to flee in panic. But flogger, who commanded light and medium tank divisions, fulminantly closed them the way to rescue and thus locked the trap...
In few hours everything finished. Cannons silenced. Tank Lovers triumphed. This Legendary Date, the 19th of October 2009 A.D was immortalized for centuries. In few more days remainings of tank haters rebels were ruthlessly finished by flogger.
Many days past since that glorious battle. Everyone in the group live in prosperity. The power in the group was divided between 3 dignified rulers: vlado32, flogger and ComeradeStalin. This triumvirate rules fairly for tank lovers and unsparingly for their enemies.
P.S. Locals gossip, that they have seen in the nearest forest one strange hermit, playing with single AT shell from destroyed A-10. Our special services reported that his name is KaanTech. Once he was our comrade, but then he betrayed us, left the group, ran to the forest and swore to destroy us. But nobody took him seriously, thus he became mad, organized a sect with one occultist and worship to AT shell as to the idol.

Sincerely yours, chronicler of Tank Lovers Group, ComeradeStalin.

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Post comment Comments  (20 - 30 of 1,031)
GettMari
GettMari May 16 2015 says:

Still waiting for the replacement of the Abrams :3

+1 vote     reply to comment
Urdnot669
Urdnot669 Jun 9 2015 replied:

The A3 variant is currently in development but they've been pretty tight lipped about what changes it will bring. Though it's probably time to just build a new vehicle entirely. The Abrams platform has gotten old.

+1 vote     reply to comment
murauder
murauder May 16 2015 replied:

That's not happening in the next 20 to 30 years. Why? Because there currently isn't any need to.

+3 votes     reply to comment
GettMari
GettMari May 19 2015 replied:

The US only replaces tanks if it will be beaten in combat like what happened to the Shermans versus Tigers in which they invented the Patton.. If someone can beat the Abrams then there will be a new tank I guess. :3

+1 vote     reply to comment
NotHarm
NotHarm May 31 2015 replied:

Tanks are only replaced until something more modern is needed or until the design has been exhausted.

For example the M26 Pershing supplemented and eventually replaced the M4 Sherman. It was late for WW2, but in time to see action in Korea. It's 90mm gun could punch through Panthers and T-34s alike. Eventually improvements were made it became the M46 Patton, the M47 Patton, then M48 Patton. As the T-55 became more prevalent the use realized the 90mm gun was starting to show it's age. So final variant of the variant of the M48 had a 105mm stuck in there and the eventually it was replaced by the M60 which is more or less the same thing. Except the M60 saw numerous improvements like a laser range finder and Thermal optic system only to replaced by the M1 series which was made in response to the T-64/T-72/T-80 series of tanks.

Like wise the Soviets made the T-62 in response to the M60 and the Chieftain. However the T-64 was better tank which lead to a new family of MBTs like the T-72 and T-80.

The M1 is going anywhere unless the US sees a need to design a new tank. Until then most countries are just going to improve upon what they already have.

+1 vote     reply to comment
Vasquez_Lichstein
Vasquez_Lichstein Jun 29 2015 replied:

I'm More Like Leopard 2A7... :-D

+1 vote     reply to comment
xX(Warrior250)Xx
xX(Warrior250)Xx May 27 2015 replied:

Abrams is my favorite tank, though.. but yeah, sometimes it might need some replacements.

+1 vote     reply to comment
Reborn:X
Reborn:X May 7 2015 says:

Lulz, a T-14 just broke down during a general rehearsal of the 9th May Victory Day Parade in Moscow, the most important public display of the combat vehicle in it's short history.

Hehehehehehehehehe.

+5 votes     reply to comment
GettMari
GettMari May 8 2015 replied:

What I picture the Russians in trying to repair it(No offense) is like the Russian Cosmonaut on Armageddon continually hammering the tank until it starts. XD

+1 vote     reply to comment
murauder
murauder May 7 2015 replied:

If this is the tank that's supposed to "outgun the west" then I feel sorry for the crew. Though that might be unfair as this is a new tank. But I think Russia's reputation/mythology for reliable and dependable military hardware has taken a dent.

+2 votes     reply to comment
OminousSpudd
OminousSpudd May 7 2015 replied:

I did have a little giggle myself.

Was expecting something similar to this though. I mean, full-scale production in 2016 for the T-14, and 2017 for the T-15? There's going to be hiccups, hence the support vehicles.

+1 vote     reply to comment
New_Empire
New_Empire May 7 2015 replied:

+ armor from paperbox
huehuehuehue

+2 votes     reply to comment
Reborn:X
Reborn:X May 7 2015 replied:

Holy ****. Russians agree with what I just bluntly wrote.

+2 votes     reply to comment
New_Empire
New_Empire May 8 2015 replied:

it was sarcasm

+2 votes     reply to comment
Orange_Tomato
Orange_Tomato May 7 2015 replied:

Nah, bruh, the downvote brigade just hasn't arrived yet.

He'res one of the vids (if you bothered to click on "show buried"/saw this before it was buried):
Youtube.com

The comentator on TV claimed "it was intentional" - love how laughably bad that damage control is.

T-15 also failed: Youtube.com

+2 votes     reply to comment
OminousSpudd
OminousSpudd May 7 2015 replied:

Btw, they weren't towed out, they waited for the end of the rehearsal and then drove out under their own power. Didn't stop the circle-jerking in the West though. xD

0 votes     reply to comment
Orange_Tomato
Orange_Tomato May 8 2015 replied:

I know, they apparently managed to restart it, but the tow vehicle was already prepared.

"circle-jerking" (god, how I hate that word, right next to russophobia) is bound to happen if you have your new, advertised tanks fail at a televised and well-visited public event, and start making ridiculously stupid claims trying to cover it up.

+3 votes     reply to comment
OminousSpudd
OminousSpudd May 11 2015 replied:

Still waiting for you to link the media who stated it was intentional. Also, funny that probably one single source would state it was intentional and you take that source and go all ape about Russia making false claims and deserving the **** storm that was stirred up against them over the event. Shouldn't have expected any less from you though.

+1 vote     reply to comment
OminousSpudd
OminousSpudd May 8 2015 replied:

Could you link the media saying that it was intentional?

+1 vote     reply to comment
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