Dead Man Zand Windows, Mac, Linux game

Someone called my name?
Erm... not really, was just typing a product sheet.
With my name on it?
Erm... yes... Can I go along with it? ... Good! As I was saying, Dead Man Zand...
Yes?
Yes what?
You called my name...
NO! I'M JUST READING A PRODUCT SHEET!
You say my name, you pay royalties!
WHAT?!!
Or...
OR WHAT?!
Or you can let me handle this...
Bah! Go play Pairs to see if your memory improves!
That was low...
AS I WAS SAYING... Dead Man Zand...
ROYALTIES...ROY-AL-TIESSSSSS...
OK! DAMN YOU! TYPE THE CURSED THING!
I'm already damned my friend...already damned... Ok, let me clear my throat... AHEM! Where was he... Ah, here it is...

Dead Man Zand is a classical graphic adventure game, combining groundbreaking aspects with the magic and humor of the 1990's adventures. (Yeah... right!) The game is set in the Underworld, an humorous and outrageous take to Purgatory, filled with funny characters and beautiful landscapes. (You never been there, have you?) It features an outrageous main character, with an astonishing chip in his shoulder, named Zand. (IF you pay my royalties, you cheapskate bastards! Otherwise you'll have to do with Mike Boner. Who the hell came up with that one anyway? Geez!) Zand unintentionally (So you say...) uncovers a terrible plot to overthrow the ruler of the Underworld and gets bewitched with a memory loss spell that will affect him throughout the game. (Thank you for making me look retarded!) The game will feature a generous amount of mini-games that will flow through the continuous action of the game, offering a streamlined experience to the players. (Oh really?! Hmm, I do like those fancy words...) There will also be no dead ends. (This is an irony right? No dead ends in the world of the dead?) The action will bifurcate at times, allowing for different solutions to the same problem. (Ahhh. Interesting... but to whom?) Funny dialogs, (Who would guess?) lots of objects to find and interactions, new approach to many classic puzzles, (What? Couldn't you create something on your own?) gameplay achievements (Weeee another groundbreaking novelty! ... Not!) and a never seen before main menu! (Specially unseen if you're blind!)

Our objective is to give a new twist to this old genre, challenging the player with many outrageous circumstances. (Well, this summary is quite outrageous!)

If I hadn't been shot in the head before, this would be a great time to do so... Au revoir, mes amis!