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Mar 24 2005 Anchor | |
In a good mood and feel like a laugh and cant find a jokes thread on moddb :o so i made one :d yay me ------------- -- 'Now, I am become Death, the destroyer of worlds.' |
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Mar 24 2005 Anchor | ||
lol haha i got a joke too When Americans first went up into space the astronauts had to write reports, but when they tried to write with a pen the ink floated around so they had trouble writing. So then the Americans spend billions of dollars creating a pen that would write in space. They succeeded, but only to find out that when the Russians went into space, they wrote with pencils. -- |_( hp )¯| p00nst3r |
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Mar 24 2005 Anchor | |
^ ahahahahahaha A man staggers into an emergency room with two black eyes and a five iron wrapped tightly around his throat. Naturally the doctor asks him what happened. Well, it was like this, said the man. I was having a quiet round of golf with my wife, when she sliced her ball into a pasture of cows. We went to look for it, and while I was rooting around I noticed one of the cows had something white at its rear end. I walked over and lifted up the "What did you do?" asks the doctor. Well, I lifted the tail and yelled to my wife, "Hey, this looks like yours!" -- 'Now, I am become Death, the destroyer of worlds.' |
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Mar 24 2005 Anchor | ||
lol hahahahhaha -- |_( hp )¯| p00nst3r |
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Mar 24 2005 Anchor | ||
Pick-up line!! Stupid Jokes!! >>A guy walks into a bar... ouch. --
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Mar 24 2005 Anchor | |
Ok, here's a pretty gross one. Please note. This joke is for mature people only. =========================================== PS: This joke was modified a little bit. But still works. Edited by (in order): Pancitcooker, Pancitcooker |
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Mar 24 2005 Anchor | ||
omg thats sick. -- |_( hp )¯| p00nst3r |
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Mar 24 2005 Anchor | ||
How do you make 20 trumpets sound good? |
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Mar 24 2005 Anchor | ||
i dont get it, what does euphoniam mean? -- |_( hp )¯| p00nst3r |
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Mar 24 2005 Anchor | |
Why Did the Kid cross the road? Edited by: TheDebonairNomad -- I'm the Bringer of Death, Fall to your knees and beg for mercy... Or Give me a Sandwich I'm hungry. |
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Mar 24 2005 Anchor | |
Time to google. lol |
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Mar 24 2005 Anchor | |
Hahaha, Nice. Stupid kid. |
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Mar 24 2005 Anchor | ||
lol i googled it but it didnt come up anything. But I did find euphonium not euphoniAm. It means "A brass wind instrument similar to the tuba but having a somewhat higher pitch and a mellower sound" -- |_( hp )¯| p00nst3r |
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Mar 24 2005 Anchor | |
what do you call a bunch of blondes lined up ear to ear? a wind tunnel... |
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Mar 24 2005 Anchor | |
A women walks into a docters office looking for some information. The doctor asks what she is after, and she says she wants to know if you can become pregnant from anal sex. The doctor replies with "Sure you can, where do you think lawyers come from?" -- ShadowLore profile: Moddb.com |
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Mar 24 2005 Anchor | ||
LOL thats hilarious -- |_( hp )¯| p00nst3r |
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Mar 24 2005 Anchor | |
A cucumber, a pickle, and a penis were all sitting around one day talking about how much their lives sucked. The cucumber said, "Man, my life sucks. Whenever I get big, fat, and juicy, someone cuts me up and puts me in a salad." So the pickle looks at him and says, "You think you have it bad? Whenever I get big, fat, and juicy, someone puts me in vinegar, puts spices on me, and sticks me in a jar." The penis glared at them both and said, "You guys think you have it rough? Whenever I get big, fat, and juicy, they put a rubber tarp over my head, stick me in a dark room, and bang my head against the wall until I throw up and pass out." -- 'Now, I am become Death, the destroyer of worlds.' |
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Mar 24 2005 Anchor | ||
lol hahaha thats funny (notice how i say that to all the jokes lol) -- |_( hp )¯| p00nst3r |
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Mar 25 2005 Anchor | |
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Mar 25 2005 Anchor | |
A man went to the Dr and the Dr said, "Ok you got aids, I need the names of the last 100 guys that rooted ya!" Man says to the Dr, "Piss off mate, I haven't got eyes in the back of me head!" -- i like biscuits |
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Mar 25 2005 Anchor | ||
lolz thats funny... in a very twisted kind of way --
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Mar 25 2005 Anchor | |
A couple were going out for the evening. They'd gotten ready, all dolled up, dog put out, etc. The taxi arrives, and as the couple start out, the dog shoots back in the house. They don't want the dog shut in the house, so the wife goes out to the taxi while the husband goes upstairs to chase the dog out. The wife, not wanting it known that the house will be empty explains to the taxi driver:"He's just going upstairs to say good-bye to my mother."A few minutes later, the husband gets into the cab. "Sorry I took so long" he says. "Stupid b*tch was hiding under the bed and I had to poke her with a coat hanger to get her to come out! Then I had to wrap her in a blanket to keep her from scratching and biting me as I hauled her ass downstairs and tossed her in the back yard! She better not sh*t in the vegetable garden again either!" ------------------------------------ Two brothers are sitting in front of the christmas tree. One of them's got a huge pile of presents, the other one's got just a small one. "Could it be", the one with the huge pile of presents says, "that our parents love me more than you?". His brother answers: "Could it be that you've got cancer?"... ------------------------------------ A chicken and an egg are lying in bed. The chicken is leaning against the headboard smoking a cigarette, with a satisfied smile on its face. The egg, looking a bit ticked off, grabs the sheet, rolls over, and says, "Well, I guess we finally answered THAT question!" Edited by: LiMeY -- 'Now, I am become Death, the destroyer of worlds.' |
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Mar 25 2005 Anchor | |
Why I Fired My Secretary It was my forty-fifth birthday. I knew my wife would say "Happy Birthday." She didn't even say, "Good Morning." I thought, maybe the children will remember. The children didn't say a word. When I started to the office I was feeling pretty low. As I walked into my office, my secretary, Janet, said, "Good morning boss, Happy Birthday." And I felt a little better; someone had remembered. I worked until noon. Then Janet knocked on my door and said, "You know, its such a beautiful day, let's go to lunch, just you and me." That was the best thing I had heard all day and I agreed. We went to lunch, into the country to a little private place. On the way back, she said, "You know, we don't need to go back to the office, do we? Let's go to my apartment." After arriving there, she said, "Boss, if you don't mind, I think I'll go into the bedroom and slip into something comfortable." Sure, I replied excitedly. In about six minutes, she came out carrying a big birthday cake, followed by my wife, children and dozens of our friends. All were singing "Happy Birthday" and there on the couch I sat... naked. -- 'Now, I am become Death, the destroyer of worlds.' |
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Mar 25 2005 Anchor | ||
A college professor was doing a study testing the senses of first graders using a bowl of lifesavers. Red............cherry Finally the professor gave them all honey lifesavers. One little girl looked up in horror , spit hers out and yelled, "Oh, my God! They're @ssholes!!" ------------------------------------------------------- Whats the difference between a computer and a woman? A woman dosen't accept 3" floppies. -------------------------------------------------------- Two tall trees, a birch and a beech, are growing in the woods. A small tree begins to grow between them, and the beech says to the birch, "Is that a son of a beech or a son of a birch?" -------------------------------------------------------- okay those were off my CS Clan forums except for the woman/computer one I heard that from my friend and I thought that was pretty funny lol. --
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