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I aint so diddy (Forums : General Banter : I aint so diddy) Locked
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Aug 10 2004 Anchor

Ha, I beat fate today, I saved the girl and battled with my fists to save my life. NO JOKE.

Okey so it was just another 5 o clock in the morning start, no biggie, so I get up and head into work and everything seems normal.

The heavens open, I am dragged off the till and due to a lazy sack of **** deputy Im forced todo the delivery. To make it worse theres a newbie Im working with who seems reluctant todo anything physical - great.

Anyway being the man I am I struggle and kick some serious ass, you have to remember that its pouring down with rain - Absolutely drenching me, I put on a freezer coat; boss and all the girls moan (I work with 15 women, only 3 guys there). So Im lugging ass while the women have a ciggy and watch.

ANYWAY delivery done, now its time to return the empties. Newbie loads up a cage with green boxes, clearly stacked to high, I load up a sensible sized one. We put them on the lift on the back of the lorry and we dont raise the lips (basically stops cages rolling backwards and splatting you). The truck guy pulls the cage in the back but the overloaded trays catch on the roof and then plummet backwards, so here we have a huge cage with green trays flying back at us, Im literally matrix jumping these huge ass trays flying at me, then like in slow-mo the actual cage buckles on itself aiming directly at my head, the driver screams me at me to look to my left...guess what, my cage is now falling at my head due to the vibrations from the other one, so I literally punch the motherfcker and send it crashing into the road, damn it hurt so bad. Anyway the dramas over, two huge cages are spilt everywhere with trays litered everywhere, the girls are literally screaming at me. Somehow its my fault WTF! Sure I didnt put the lips up but if I had the cage wouldve jacked at a smaller angle and took my godam head off.

^ RAMBLE, I wish I had it on tape somehow.

ANYWAY, later on after hours of being moaned at even though its not my fault the till buzzer goes and Janine, 3 months preggers, is standing there staring at nothing, the customers looking around, I go upto her and ask whats up and she starts to tumble backwards, being the man I am I catch her in my arms, lie her down and put her in the recovery position, she has alittle fit, shaking around and shit, anyway, the boss tells us to carry on serving (WTF) why a lady sorts her out, so there we are serving while shes lying there spazzed out My hands were shaking, I was so scared, Ive never seen anyone out of it like that, she was literally dead eyed and zoned.

Anyway, enough ramble, Im a hero.

Poorly made diagram; Wuggawoo.com

original source

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Why wont it save me?

Aug 10 2004 Anchor

Scareh :O

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jacksonj04
jacksonj04 Over 9000
Aug 10 2004 Anchor

ubar!

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leilei
leilei The person who doesn't like anything
Aug 10 2004 Anchor

Well well

I survived the January 17, 1994 San Andreas fault down in LA

:paranoid: Talk about dangerous, I learned my lesson

NEVER walk on stairs during earthquakes

- Edited By CheapAlert On Tue 10th, Aug 2004 @ 8:20:30pm

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chis
chis Old man.
Aug 10 2004 Anchor

ROFL HAHA @ diagram

but sacry :|

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Nothing.

Aug 10 2004 Anchor

I don't get it. You killed a cage?

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Aug 10 2004 Anchor

the cage was vicious! I think he shouldnt be charged for the homocide :/

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Teh_Wolf
Teh_Wolf Carnager Of Pixels
Aug 10 2004 Anchor

WTF? What are these trays, where do you work?

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Pengus
Pengus Big-Sexy-BiRacial-Man
Aug 10 2004 Anchor

A supermarket maybe???

Very odd day. And pregnet women always freak me out.

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leilei
leilei The person who doesn't like anything
Aug 10 2004 Anchor

Shopping carts aren't kind to cars either.

Metal containers are posessed, watch out :paranoid:

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Aug 10 2004 Anchor

maybe lunch trays lol :confused:

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Neo-Reloaded
Neo-Reloaded I think i'm BaCk! :) i'm 18 now :P 28/03 (H)
Aug 10 2004 Anchor

i don't really understand, but congrats anyway :P :/

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**wearing a christmas hat since xmas 2004 :)** ThAt'S ThE sPiRiT! ;)
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chis
chis Old man.
Aug 10 2004 Anchor

how cant you understand?

THE BOY NEARLY GOT KILLED MY CARTS FALLING OUT THE BACK OF A VAN

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Sticky
Sticky I'm pretty awesome.
Aug 10 2004 Anchor

Go azz0r! (in my besht Shean Connery voish) Ah, ya done well highlanda! Those eevil trays were no match for ya!

chis
chis Old man.
Aug 10 2004 Anchor

I can do sean connery voice :paranoid:

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Nothing.

Teh_Wolf
Teh_Wolf Carnager Of Pixels
Aug 10 2004 Anchor

I just want to know what his job is...

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Chewbacca
Chewbacca modDB Wookie
Aug 10 2004 Anchor

What do you use cages for ? Do you work on a petshop or something like that ?

By the way, congratulations for your leet skills! And my bro said that you was kinda hero for helping the woman and saving yourself!

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Pengus
Pengus Big-Sexy-BiRacial-Man
Aug 11 2004 Anchor

cHIs-wK wrote: I can do sean connery voice :paranoid:


Really i wouldnt have guessed. :)

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SkitZaY
SkitZaY u mad
Aug 11 2004 Anchor

YaY For azz0r!! :D

lol @ diagram

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uwu


frosty-theaussie
frosty-theaussie Sonny Jim
Aug 11 2004 Anchor

Woah goddamn, now that's a day of work. Hopefully the job won't stay at that pace for your sake O_O

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ShortCutMan
ShortCutMan ♥ Pure ♥ Bred ♥ Geek ♥
Aug 11 2004 Anchor

Most fun I get out of my job is giving some angry dogs the finger. :/

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leilei
leilei The person who doesn't like anything
Aug 11 2004 Anchor

azz0r - maybe this video should console you on how worse it could have happen.

Shorty - BESTIALITY IS ILLEGAL YOU KNOW

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ForK
ForK NEED MORE COW BELL!
Aug 11 2004 Anchor

I just want to say:



ROFL

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i like biscuits

Aug 11 2004 Anchor

The cages are huge metal square things that they put green trays on, the green trays carry items (you know, food n shit) but when you do returns theyre empty and tightly packed together.

I work @ tescos two days a week being a till slave or box humper

arvey-Haynos
arvey-Haynos ModDB Wickerman
Aug 11 2004 Anchor

Well done azz0r, I worked in a supermarket, wouldn't want a pile of those trays falling on me. How's your hand? I'm sure it must've hurt a lot to punch your way out.

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